Tuesday, 5 April 2011

The internet stole my dignity. I want it back.

Since when did the internet turn into a place where we can't be who we want to be? It's a non-face-to-face network of people, where most of them are open liars at that, and as a consequence, pretty much nothing on it should ever be taken as actual fact (except anything on Fox News; that shit's ALL legit). So why, oh for god's sake why, do companies think that it's acceptable to put advertising that shows us who we 'need to be' and how we should go about it? Does anyone remember when YouTube was ad-free? When you could watch something from Channel 4, or view a trailer for yet another Final Fantasy sequel, without getting a massive stupid advert for make-up or a new kind of yoghurt that you're never even going to eat on your screen?
It's only recently that it's changed, and after a small amount of research, I saw that the first 'group' of people attempting to organise something to remove the adverts had 84 members. 84. There's 20 hours of footage uploaded to YouTube every minute, and there's 84 people trying to get rid of adverts. They're on everything as well; no video is safe. There's adverts before you watch footage of a local band from a gig you missed the other night, which means that whoever put the advert there is making money from a band that makes none. They tell you that you need some more stuff to look good; persuade you that you need this new piece of technology just to get by, or that you're simply overweight, or that you need to watch another shitty Rom-Com that's destroyed a macho action star (Bounty Hunter - MY ARSE.) And if you've good hideously poor internet, such as mine (0.5mb/s), the adverts can take up to a minute to stream at 360p even if they're only 5 seconds long.
 This, apparently, is totally fine. No one on the internet cares. Nobody. Oh no, wait, there's 84 people that are arsed. So come on, stop being told what to do, stop being pushed around by advertising dickheads. Sort something out; go and sign the petition, do your bit. If you like the internet that is.
  And if you don't, then there's always the group of 23 people who want Gerard Butler to make another fucking Rom-Com.

I'm new here. Be nice or I'll vomit.

Hello all. If you're reading this, you're probably one of the friends that I've suckered into reading this rubbish. If you are, I whole-heartedly apologise. If you aren't, however, you've brought this upon yourself, and I hold no responsibility for any reaction you may have to it. Oh, and sorry.